Dating

Yesterday I went on a date with the new guy who I shall call Bicycle Man or Bikey for short. We rode bikes to Golfland and did two courses. We would have done the last one if we had time and if the course had not been closed. I had a lot of fun because Bikey is a cool nice guy. It was an okay date. It was fun but I still think I messed things up for myself.

We both have been hurt in the past and I believe we are both not in a place to be serious because we do not want to be hurt again. Sadly, this leads us to being dumb and getting hurt again. I know that sometimes I focus on the negative when I tell stories to everyone and I'm sorry. I think this paints a picture of a guy for my friends that is not accurate. I also have my faults. I recently told Bikey that he would never met my friends because what would the point be since we are not going anywhere. Way to shoot myself in the foot. I'm sure when he tells that story to his friends I'm going to look like a douche or bitch. I will take it back and he is welcome to meet my friends if it comes up. Just because there is no long term future does not mean I should limit the present.

I get defensive and this guy has given me permission to be completely honest and this has lead to me poking at him because sadly I cannot control myself sometimes. Happily enough so far, Bikey has stuck around and had fun with it. We earned requests of each other when we got holes in one. I asked for coloring and for him to read me a short story. I then realized I asked a kindergarten teacher to color and do story time. Oops. I will change the story time to a date where we wear each other clothes in public. I'm thinking he could pull of my heron skirt and pretty green top. He asked me to drunk dial him the first time I get drunk no matter how far in the future and how things ended. I think that is hilarious and will do. I implied that I was going to ask him to eat cat food. He was kinda grossed out.

I still feel that we have had too many serious talks and they started because of Bikey but are continuing because of me. I'm going to try to keep it light and fluffy. Here is some future plans that I think would be fun. Playing in the mud and making mud forts in his backyard (because I do not have one). Going to the park to eat popsicles, feed the ducks, and have a picnic. Anyone else have fun ideas?

I'm emailing other guys and keeping my eyes open for other men, but time is such a factor. I am scared that if Bikey and I only date each other it will get exclusive just because that seems to happen, but I have to just tell myself that does not mean it will be serious. I will strive to be more positive! Not just at dating but work as well. I will still tell negative stories but I will try to temper them.